This is a topic/post I roll around in my head a lot and debate on if its worth writing about. But its been on my mind more lately, so I will just throw it out there.
In general, I would say that friendships have always been something I struggle with a bit. Mostly girl friendships, there have been a few guys friends over the years that I connected with fine. I really did not like high school all that much. I never felt like I had a crowd, a group to call my own. Stuck between my goody-goody friends and that crowd that partied. For the record, I did not party in high school. To me the risk far out weighed the benefits. I could not wait for college and the opportunity to do my own thing, find a more diverse group of friends I could call my own.
I ended up joining a sorority in college, and mad some really close friends. But a few things happened towards the end of those 4.5 years and some of those friendships fizzled out. Turns out we had a lot of fun together while we were there, but that fun did not transition well into being a grown up.
Its been 11 years since I graduated college and I can count my close friends on one hand. I have lots of medium-close friends, but only a couple of people I regularly keep in touch with. Part of the problem is that we live about 3 hours from the major cities where most of our friends moved to after college. Part of the problem is that as a working Mom, I work, commute, and hang out with my family. There isn't a lot of free time to do girls nights, happy hours, book clubs, etc. And I am usually fine with that, as somewhat of an introvert I enjoy time at home with just my family.
But every once in awhile, pictures on Facebook of girls supper clubs and girls weekends really get to me. I don't really have that type of group, 5-10 girl friends that get together monthly while the husbands watch the kids. My friends are scattered, different places, from different periods in my life. Its something that does make me a little sad, but I don't really do anything to fix it. I don't want to join Junior League. I don't have time for Mom's groups. And quite frankly I sometimes have trouble connecting with SAHMs. Not that there is anything wrong with staying at home, its just that our lives are very different.
I am hoping that when H starts elementary school, or when I don't work and commute as much, that I can work on building a closer network of local friends. But maybe that is not possible, I know some of has to do with me and my personality type. And the other day as we approached the park in the stroller, H said to me, "Mom I don't want to play with the big kids at the park, I just want to play by myself." So apparently she is a little like me, because sometimes I would just rather play by myself too.